Sunday, April 14, 2013

Friday, April 11, 2013

Brittney's Message: As a mother this has been the hardest thing in my life..... Wanting to be at the hospital every second with Darby Kate but having to also try to make a somewhat normal life for Will and trying to hide the pain I feel inside when I am with him. Until this point, whatever happened with Darby Kate was options made by doctors for her sick heart. Now it has been turned over to Jason and I in making a decision on what is best for her. Before yesterday I would not have considered trying anything else for knowing and seeing all my sweet baby has gone through but hearing the words, "you can give up" changed everything. We have come so far and already faced so many struggles to just give up on Darby Kate. It is in Gods hands and as long as there is one more option why throw the towel in at the end and quit when he has gotten us this far? We talked with two different doctors last night and both had different views on the best treatment for Darby Kate while she waited for a heart. The plan is for their entire team to discuss the best option and present it to us this morning after rounds. Please continue to pray for her and for us. Yesterday I found myself wanting to become angry but knew I would be breaking my promise to God in never questioning his whole plan in giving Darby Kate to us. I prayed, read through all of your words and encouragement, and listened to songs that have been posted for us to get through that weak moment. I can not thank each of you enough for all the kind words and prayers you are sending up for our sweet, sweet baby!!

11:45 a.m. We are getting all necessary paperwork completed to get her added to the donor list. Transplantation is our only option at this time. She is currently getting the ECMO rerouted to her groin an neck so they can close her chest. Please continue to pray.

11:00 p.m. We had a small set back. Her chest was closed this morning and the ECMO lines were moved to her neck and groin. Tonight they had to open her chest up to stop bleeding that did not stop itself all day. They have had to give her blood throughout the day so she has gained some size from swelling. They have the bleeding stopped but they were unable to completely close the chest back. It will probably be Monday or Tuesday before they get it completely closed. She is stable and there is still no sign of infection.

1:00 p.m.   I have had a hard time praying for a heart. I want a heart desperately for my baby but it hit me after receiving official word that she was on the list that someone's child would have to die before she could receive a heart. I know the pain we have felt already and the grief that will come if something happens to Darby Kate. I am feeling guilty for wanting something so bad that comes at such a cost for another family. Can anyone give guidance on this?

3:00 p.m. Darby Kate is officially on the heart transplant list!! He will give any little details. I just wanted to give the good news first!!


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